Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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