he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
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