forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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