what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
