turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He did a backflip because drugs
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
