before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
