i wish peter jackson would direct porn
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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