brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Betty ford says i'm here all night
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
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