You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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