They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
