plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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