i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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