Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
