We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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