no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize