Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
