He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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