I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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