I wish I could punch you in the face.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
