i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Randomize
