lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
cat food counts as protein by the way
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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