I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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