can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
false alarm. still invincible.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
