Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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