why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
