NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
