Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
