I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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