You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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