K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
