Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
