their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
