Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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