Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize