how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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