please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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