Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
