Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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