Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i barfeds in our rink
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
My day in three words: secret purse cake
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
