Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
