Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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