what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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