Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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