I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
