Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize