Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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