Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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