So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
