btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
