guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize