The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
